Shit! That happened 1,000 years ago!

Book de Klaus

In the history of man there have been only 2 immaculate conceptions. The first being God and the Virgin Mary and the birth of their son, Jesus. The second was Satan and the Virgin Erica and the birth of their son, Santa. On the anniversary of his birth, there were always a great number of unexplained deaths and murders. This day became known as the day of slayings. Eventually, Christianity spread and when the day of the slayings arrived, townspeople would have a mass of Christ, or "Christ Mass". There they prayed to their lord for protection. In the beginning of the 11th century, one of God's angels took the form of man and descended from heaven.

He encountered the young, ill-tempered Santa not far from his home. Santa was ice fishing with the little people, the elves, on a frozen lake. Knowing the son of Satan was a gambling sort, the angel challenged him to a contest. The contest was a simple one. Who could slide a rock across the lake and land it closest to the ice fishing hole with out the rock falling in. If Santa won, he would deliver the confident old manto his father for an eternity of pain and suffering. If the old man won the contest, Santa would not only have to cease the day of slayings for the next 1000 years, but also have to turn the day of slayings into a day of joy.

Santa thought this was as close to a sure wager as could be, there was no way a mere mortal was going to be able to defeat him in anything.

Santa was so sure of himself that he went first. His rock landed as close as it could possibly be to the hole without going in it.

The old man's rock skidded slowly along....and it came to rest touching Santa's rock with just enough momentum to push Santa's stone over into the hole. The old man had won.

But take my advice...it's been 1,000 years coming this Christmas...I'd be a little careful what I'd ask Santa for this year.